MSP – 5

5. They Don’t Worry About Pleasing Everyone

“Mentally strong people recognize that they don’t need to please everyone all the time. They’re not afraid to say no or speak up when necessary.  They strive to be kind and fair, but can handle other people being upset if they didn’t make them happy.”

Beverly introduced me to a concept: “What others think of me is, none of my business.”

It took a real long time for me to “get this.”  For a great prat of my adult life I felt as if I did, have to please everyone.  To do this I would take on different ‘persons.’  I became one person for my wife, another for my kids, someone else for the guys I worked with, a different guy for those I worked for – and someone entirely different for those I didn’t know.  The end result of all this was, I lost my self.  The only time I I felt I was ‘really me’ was when I was drinking.  Because when I was “lit” I didn’t care what you or anyone else thought.

Then Beverly told me, “Bob, what others think of you is none of your business.”

I took this and wrote it down on 3″ x 5″ card, and taped it to my bathroom mirror – and I read it every day, at least once a day, until it began to sink in.  And after 3-4 years, the light began to come on!

Today I am not ‘insensitive’ to what others think; I just don’t react like I used to – to what I think they are thinking.  I am not able to read minds anymore!  Shocking, I know!  And, liberating.

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