In the Spring of 1988 I had an annoying head cold. After a while, it got to the point where I couldn’t ignore it anymore. So I headed into the Flight Surgeon’s. (I was still in the Air Force at the time.) The visit was pretty straight-forward and soon I was on my way…
When I got outside, as I crossed through the parking lot, I began reading the label. Why? Oh hell, I don’t know, but I do. In essence it read: “Take two tablets every four hours, orally by mouth.” As I let it sink it, it hit me – hard! How else would you take them?
It was a bright sunny day, that morning. Other than the annoying head cold, I was feeling pretty good. And as I let this sink in, it almost brought me to my knees!
I then began to wonder, “Why did ‘they’ – whoever ‘they’ are – think ‘they’ had to put ‘orally by mouth’ on the label?” All I could think of was some cretin shoving a couple cold tablets up his ass! And then I just couldn’t get the image out of my mind! I soon was bent over in laughter in the parking lot that morning…
Since I was grounded I headed back into the Clinic – to the pharmacy. “I have a question,” I announced. And then the fun began. For their part, the pharmacists and techs were ‘trying’ to maintain a degree of professionalism, but I wouldn’t let up! In a ‘deadpan’ manner I kept asking questions. Soon I had them all laughing; and then, I was on my way…
“Take two tablets, orally by mouth…” YGBSM!