This is a story of a “different flavor” than the preceding one. This story took place at the Alamo Cafe, in San Antonio, TX, in the mid-’80’s.
One evening four of us, and our wives, decided to go out for ‘Mexican.’ The Alamo Cafe was ‘the place’ to go in those days; at least, one of them! Seating in the Alamo Cafe at the time was ‘family style.’ They had long tables set up through the dining area as opposed to individual tables, or booths. The place was packed that night, but we managed to find 8 places, 4 on each side of this one table.
Oh, how the beer was flowing that evening! And the conversation – “There I was…!” It wasn’t long before I spotted our waitress making her way towards us between two cramped rows of seats. It was very tight, and she was having problems balancing the over-sized tray.
When she was about 4-6 feet from us I saw the tray begin to wobble. It was barely perceivable at first, then it became very pronounced. I have always been very good at predicting “impact points,” and this evening was no different. I knew with one or two more oscillations, I was going to be ‘wearing’ that tray of Mexican food! And I had no where to go – it was that crowded.
As predicted, the tray lost “critical balance,” and here it came. Tostadoes, burritos, tacos, tamales, and the whole enchilada – all hit on my right shoulder! The waitress was horrified. People all around me were scrambling. Noise. Commotion.
“Well, hell,” I thought to myself, as I reached for my beer. Soon, one of the guys we were with, asked for the chips. He then asked me to turn one way or the other so he could get a scoop of guacamole. Then another guy took a chip and went for the bean dip. And so it began! I was the hor d’oeuvres rotating centerpiece. Festive!
Soon the manager showed up and apologized profusely. He offered to pay for the dry cleaning of my shirt, and he compensated our meals for us. I stepped aside with him and told him not to worry about anything if he would not fire the waitress. She was mortified. He assured me that nothing would happen to her, and he still comp’ed us for our meals. All was good!
I’m glad these guys weren’t at the birthday party in Columbus on Valentine’s Day, 2011. Oh, the crap I would have taken…LOL!