I Used to Think I Was…

You’ve lived to be 66, and you think you just might know who you are….

A former Air Force pilot came into town one morning in a tattered old flight jacket.  He sat down in a booth at his favorite coffee shop to order breakfast.

As he sat there, taking his first sip of coffee, an attractive young woman approach with her drink, sat down across from him and asked, “Sir, Are you a real pilot?”

“Well,” he replied, “I’ve spent my whole life flying jets; first Tweets (T-37s), then Talons (T-38s)… Went on then to fly Starlifters (C-141s) and Herks (C-130s) for a bit, all over the World.  Later I flew ’38s as an Instructor Pilot, logging well over 3200 hours in those suckers.  Probably taught well over 1500 kids to fly – cheating Death many times more than I care to think about.  So I suppose you could call me a real pilot.”

“And what do you do, young lady?” he asked, to be polite.

“Well,” she said, “I’m a lesbian.  I spend my whole day thinking about naked women.  As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about naked women.  When I shower, I think about naked women.  When I watch TV, I think about naked women.  It seems everything makes me think of naked women.”

The two then sat there, sipping their coffee in silence.  The old pilot, somewhat in deep reflection.  Soon the young lady announced that she had to go; that she had a date…

A little while later, a young man sat down on in the booth and he too, asked: “Sir, are you a real pilot?”

The aviator sat there for a moment, staring at his coffee, still a bit confused, then replied, “Well, I always thought I was; but I just found out I’m a lesbian.”

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