Lonely Pilot Bob

I think we, as a nation, are becoming a nation of “sissy boys.”  Listening to Fox News this morning, they reported that a kid has been suspended from pre-school for pointing his finger at another kid, like a gun.  Oh give me a break!  It seems that if a kid plays ‘Cowboys and Indians’ he runs the risk of being hammered; however if he walks around holding hands with another boy, well – that’s ‘cute.’  Wonder how long I would have been suspended for playing ‘Cowboys and Ragheads?’

I saw this ‘sissy boy mindset’ begin to creep into our squadron in the mid-80’s.  On a formation check ride I was administering, I was briefed by the student, that all of our turns for turning rejoins would be to the left.  WTF, over?  When I asked why, I was told so that it would be easier for the student in pilot training – to know what was coming.  Oh… When I suggested that one turning rejoin to the right might not be a bad idea, I was told, “I am the IP here, and right turning rejoins are what we are going to do on this sortie.!”  Oh…

I then asked where he came up with this idea and he told me his IP at PIT gave him the technique.  Oh…

When we gave check rides at PIT we were the “student mode” after the initial briefing.  If we had to come out of the student mode for anything other than an emergency, the student was more or less, Unsat.  Those were the rules.  However, on this day I decided to cut the kid some slack.

They say to ‘praise in public and critique in private.’  So in front of the other 3 guys in the formation I called a “Time Out.”  I was a Lt. Col. and the formation commander at the time – do you think the kid, or anyone else, was going to argue?  So, I told him, “Look Kid, the ‘soft sell’ doesn’t seem to be working here.  If you don’t amend your briefing to include right turning rejoins, we are not going to fly this ride.  Questions?”  There were none.  The briefing was amended, and we flew without further issue…

On the way out to the jet, I stopped by “E” Flight and quizzed the IP in question here – why he would teach such a technique?  “Well Sir,” he began to explain, “my IP, a former F-4 pilot (as if this made any difference to me) told me this was the best way to build confidence in a student.”

I then told him that in Check Section we needed to see a complete picture of the training the students were receiving.  He then ‘dug his heels in’ and told me that he thought it was a good technique, and he would continue to use it.  The “soft sell” wasn’t working with this bozo either!  So, I told him, “Let me be very clear here: if another one of your students comes down and briefs only right or left turning rejoins on a check ride, we will smoke him in the briefing.  Any questions, captain?”

I have no clue what ever happened to the student here, but the IP went on to become the 560th Squadron Commander a few years later.  Swell…

When I was a kid, my folks had an album of “risque” Air Force songs by Oscar Brand.  (He used the word “ass.”  Oh, Horrors!)   It was a 78 rpm record.  Remember those?  Anyway, we weren’t allowed to listen to it, because it was “risque.”  However, when they were over to the Officer’s Club, it wasn’t that risque!  LOL…

One of the songs was “Throw a Nickel on the Grass.”  It’s a Fighter Pilot song, and tends to upset shoeclerks.  Oh well…

Recently I received an email from Bill F. wherein he shared an account of an “informal” memorial ceremony held for Col. Ralph S. Parr at the Randolph AFB O’Club – now the Parr Club.  Again in his words:

“After the official internment ceremony Ralph’s widow Margaret asked everyone to “throw a nickel on the grass” for Ralph.  The family even had extra nickels for those who came unprepared.  Makes me wonder what the maintenance folks thought when they started cleaning up the area.  Several extra nickels, patches, challenge coins etc wound up on the casket.  The final attached picture is Margaret Parr next to the casket.  The helmet was the one he used in Korea.”

And one more comment, addressing Bill’s ‘wonderings’ about the maintenance folks having to police the area for nickels.  From my experience this would not have been an issue.  While the festivities were held at Ft. Sam National Cemetery, had they been held at the patio of the Parr O’Club, there would have been a multitude of shoeclerks overlooking from the nice ‘Formal Bar’ upstairs.  Once the first one saw a nickel being tossed into the grass, he/she would have been down the stairs and out the door in a heartbeat – to get on his hands and knees to grovel for that nickel.  They just can’t help themselves!  So, I have no doubt there were ‘shoeclerks’ drawn to the event who would have gleefully policed the area after everyone left….

I received an email yesterday from a dear friend.  He in turn related a story about Col. Ralph S. Parr, Fighter Pilot that (absolutely) needs to be told, and preserved.

Col. Parr was a Fighter Pilot.  He recently passed away:

I didn’t know Col. Parr, but I had seen him on numerous occasions – at the Randolph AFB Officer’s Club.  I think I was always in “aw” of him… Anyway, yesterday Bill sent this anecdote about him, probably best told in Bill’s words:

“The O’ Club at Randolph was named after Ralph a few years ago.  During the rather serious ceremony outside the club, Ralph’s grand-daughter starts to giggle almost uncontrollably.  Her dad gives her “the look,” but she can’t help herself.  Finally he asks “What is so funny?”.  She says “Do you see the sign on the club?”  ( It reads PARR  CLUB )  “Do you know what it says backwards?”  (BUL  CRRAP)  Now the step son is having a hard time keeping it together.  At some later date the sign on the club is changed to read PARR O’ CLUB.”  Ya gotta love it!

And wouldn’t you know it: leave it to PC shoeclerks to “ruin” something Fighter Pilots all over the world would relish – and Col. Parr himself, probably would appreciate…

GBU Colonel Parr: